so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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