I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I'm just crazy horny about you
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
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