Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
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there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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