So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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