I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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