Your dad touched me again.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
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