They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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