my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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