i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
