He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
