I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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