Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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