Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize
