I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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