So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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