You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
