To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
this will be a night to untag.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
