'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
