So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
