why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize