bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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