glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Boobs are out for the taking
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
When are your genitals available?
Randomize
