marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
So. Much. Porn.
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