Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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