she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize