Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
