i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
