We're like a lot better than the average bears
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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