Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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