So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
