I got chris browned last night
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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