Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
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