He had one of those small greek statue penises
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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