it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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