so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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