so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Randomize