I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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