why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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