i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
