i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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