oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
