Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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