Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
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kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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