last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
