You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
