I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
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dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
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I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
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