Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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