you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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