Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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