i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
